...well I needed brown boots to match my brown handbag (that I don't have yet)...

I REALLY ♥ Zappos.com

Okay. I have been in sequestration (except for having my final class sort-of-meeting today for teaching and a last-minute trip to TU Special Collections to review stuff before they close for the weekend) to work on my final paper. But I must break through to write a quick blog today because I just CANNOT believe the amazing service from Zappos.com. As you may know, I love Clarks boots. And they discontinued the style that I like, so when I found out I bought an extra pair of black (I even wear them in Court), a pair in tan, but no dark brown. And then kicked myself when there were no dark brown left to buy. Well, yesterday I am searching the web to see if anyone has any left and Zappos.com (which is where I buy almost all of my shoes) had ONE PAIR LEFT in my size! So I ordered them. Now, if you don't know, Zappos.com offers free shipping AND free return shipping if something doesn't fit or you hate it. But they also upgrade shipping on every order. So I slam plastic and grab that last pair, get my confirmation e-mail that the boots should arrive Monday. But NO! Wait! It gets better! (I know the guys out there are all bored now...sorry!) So I get the "upgrade" e-mail today...mind you, I ordered them yesterday at about 3:00 p.m. Anyway, I barely have time to read the e-mail when UPS is out front with...you guessed it...my boots! Now that's impressive. And I am tough to impress. So, a big thanks to Zappos.com and my recommendation to all of you. Give them a try. They're FABULOUS!

Vanessa Bruno Wedge Sandals

New Heights

Not to be outdone by Rachel, I have just received my new FOUR INCH HIGH strappy sandals for summer. Actually, they were ordered two months ago but have been on backorder due to their outrageous popularity (and the fact that they were featured in SHOP,Etc. which apparently leads to everything featured selling out minutes after the magazine hits the stand!). They are from LaRedoute in Paris. And they are not as pink as they looked...more of a peachy metallic sort of color. (I should note that Hermès has a pair in exactly the same style but a different color that are about $400 more!) Anyway, I put them on as soon as they arrived and then realized that I had the sprinkler on in the front yard. So I got to trot out in these very high shoes in my very NOT totally flat grass and move the sprinkler. I actually did not fall and break my ankle, so that is a good thing. And for four inch wedges they are not uncomfortable. And they will be cute with my cropped khakis (which, Rachel, are the ONLY "beige" pants I own...LOL)!

I ♥ CHLOE

Fashionably Late

Can someone please tell me why it is that we subscribe to magazines? Because I thought it was in order to get the magazine BEFORE it hit the stores. But apparently this is no longer the case. For one thing, I have now sent subscriptions in for SHOP,Etc. no less than three times and I have yet to receive a single issue, a bill, or any acknowledgement whatsoever. Alternatively, I will occassionally buy a magazine and fill out a subscription card only to have them immediately send me the issue I just purchased! I do successfully subscribe to Lucky (and yes, I did end up with the issue I had just purchased), and that seems to be going well, but Vogue...there is a magazine that is fashionably LATE to my mailbox with regularity. I spotted the new issue Friday. Yes, FRIDAY of last week at a GROCERY store! Well, I think...surely it will come Saturday. No. Monday? Wrong. Uh huh...maybe today? Meanwhile I am fighting my urge to go buy the grocery store copy because I NEED something to do while I put off writing my final paper for "History and Theories of the Book."

Hello, My Name Is...

...ET, and I'm a shopaholic. ("Hi ET"). Thank you. I read an article tonight that says if you are spending more than 20% of your post-tax income on clothing, bags, etc., you have a problem. Okay, I don't think I fall into THAT category, but then it went on to have you/me evaluate WHAT you/I consistently purchase (colors, items, etc.) and whether I love "classics" or the "It Bag" of the season. I have to say that I am (as my old pal -- who really WAS my old pal at one time -- Adam used to say) "conservative" when it comes to attire. I believe another word for this is "boring." I like what I like...bootcut jeans, white shirts (of infinite variety...I bought another three just this weekend!), grey grey grey, CASHMERE (I LOVE cashmere twinsets, especially in grey), and sweaters by the boatload. Literally. My husband is a color guy. I am a not-color girl. If it's neutral it is IN my closet. Grey, cream, black, white, "natural", brown. You get the idea. So I can have a few "seasonal items" (hey, I have the requisite sterling and pearl chain AND a turquoise necklace) without going too far afield, but the bags...ohhh...I love the bags! So, you could say, I use the "It Bag" to define my look. Sort of punch up the old "white t-shirt and jeans" routine (oh, and blazers...particularly suede...big fan of the blazer here!). I guess that's not so bad. I wear them to school, wear them to the office, wear them to teach. Multifunctional. So now that I have the basics in place, and I have (theoretically) picked out (or made YOU pick out) the "It Bag" for the new season, it's time to put the remaining funds to some semblance of good use. Has anyone read "Young, Fabulous and Broke" or "Start Late, Finish Rich?" If so, please tell me if these are worth the investment. Pardon the pun.

The "other" Chloe Paddington...I think I'm in love. Rachel and Rob, now that you can see a better photo does this still look like an S&M bag to you? Or are you sticking with the other model?

False Advertising

I have a lovely copy of Elle magazine...the April 2005 issue...with a huge section of cover text that reads "Spring's 100+ Hottest Shoes and Bags." In the Table of Contents (which generally appears at around page 30 now...what's up with that?) it lists two page numbers where I should look for these hot shoes and bags. Only, I don't see 100. I see maybe five--on the first page listed (and it's subsequent pages). On the second page listing I don't see ANY. Okay, maybe the model in the photo is wearing shoes...maybe not. But I am not seeing some fantastic lineup of must-have handbags, much less 100+. Perhaps if I could up ALL the bags and shoes (not by pair, but individually) in the entire issue it would get us up to 100, but I feel like I have been robbed. Here I am all set to dig into the latest and greatest bags that I will have to pine for or hunt down, and nada! Damn! It should read "100+ advertisements and SOME shoes and/or bags IF you can find them." Disappointed.

Solitaire or wide band with side stones? I have shown three views of each...your comments?

I'm a friend of Bill E.

A big THANK YOU to my neighbor Bill for fixing my car. Let me explain (it's been a lousy week). Okay...so Tuesday I go to turn in my enrollment card. Wait, I have to go back further than that. Okay, so I was SECOND in line to actually meet with my advisor to pick classes, and we are supposed to be able to enroll online...so I try to enroll afterward online and it tells me they are not taking online enrollment YET. So I try again when they ARE taking online enrollment and it tells me my classes are closed. Of course, by now I have no idea where my original enrollment card (signed by my advisor that will get me into the closed classes) is, but eventually I find it. (Now, I should interject here that I tried to hand-deliver the card to the graduate office from the very beginning, but there was no parking available when I went so I took it home to try the online stuff.) So I go back, yet again, to the Graduate office and LO, there is a parking spot. So I park, get out of the car, and the wind catches the damn enrollment card and it goes flying. But alas, someone catches it and gives it back to me and I am off to the Graduate office, where it takes me about three minutes to have them enroll me and override the system. Whereupon I go back out to my car to find a parking ticket. WHAT? I take it off the windshield and it says $50 for parking in a fire lane and "fine doubles if not paid within ten days." Okay...when did they put a fire lane in? That parking has always (for as long as I have been at the University...which is, off an on, at least five years now) been a 15 minute parking zone. And other cars were parked there, too (also ticketed). And I was only in it for maybe five minutes, tops. So I look and, sure enough, they have painted the curb (which I could not see because of the other cars parked there) red. They didn't let anyone know about the change, no e-mail update, no sign, nothing. So I took my little ticket into the Business Office and told them what happened and asked when the hell they had turned our parking spots into a damn fire lane. They said it was painted the previous week and nothing was sent out, but if I took the ticket to Security (and having no prior tickets) and explained it to them NICELY that they might waive it or reduce it to $5. But the lady I need to talk to is only in between 10 and 2. So the next day I let my class out early so I can get to Security before 2:00. I find (eventually) the building, but I have driven past the guest parking by the time I spot the office. So I have to back up. Only, the red curb isn't the only one I miss. This time there is a section of curb protruding--for some ridiculous reason which is still not clear to me--into the parking lot...and I run over it. Not a big deal...just a curb, right? WRONG! Apparently the road sloped down, but the curb remained level, so once I backed all the way over I was a good 18 inches off the road and the drop jacked up the running board on my car. So now my $50 ticket has turned into a $500 deductible. DAMN IT! Anyway, I picked up the pieces (of the clamps that hold the panel in place, as it turned out) and stuck them in the car and proceeded to the Security office where I DID get my ticket waived. And was told that they have no intention of telling the school at large that the parking lot has been changed. Nice, thanks. So I went on my (pissed off) way with the running board piece sticking out at the back and hoping that it didn't fall off if I hit a bump. It looked like something that could just be stuck back in place, but this was not working for me. Fortunately Bill, the neighbor, works on cars for a living and he was able to figure it out. The last clamp piece was broken, so I would have to replace the WHOLE panel to fix it exactly the right way, but he was able to move the various clamps around so they were evenly spaced (and use the one I saved from the "site") and now it looks almost as good as new. And so I will not have to shell out $500 immediately to cover the deductible. The moral of this story is--if you back up over a curb, for God's sake go forward IMMEDIATELY and find another way! Save your car! Watch the curbs for new and ticketable changes. And always live next to someone who knows more about cars than you do. Thanks Bill!

Wasting Time

So it is 4:00 and I have done nothing really constructive all day. I have looked at a couple of jobs...waiting on more information...and have not done the ones that I have. Or started my final paper for History and Theories of the Book. I have to somehow generate twenty pages of "journal worthy" verbiage over something that, after sixteen weeks, I clearly still do not understand. Nor do I care. It's just another collegiate hoop for me to jump through to get another piece of paper that says I did something. That something is, for the most part, wasted quite a bit of money. So the semester is almost over. Yesterday was the last "official" class meeting before exams/papers, and tomorrow is the last "official" class meeting for the classes I am teaching. Then I'm off to writing papers and grading papers, while trying to summon the will to work on stuff from the office, as well. I am completely burned out, and now everyone wants more...take this exam over the summer, take that series of exams...I took the fucking Bar exam, I am taking class exams, and I am TIRED of taking exams. I am tired of having a job that I hate, while trying to work my ass off to do a job I would enjoy, and in the meantime, being almost stalked by someone who wants to interview me for a job that would require a severe cut in both salary AND free time...yet I feel compelled to interview for it "just in case." Just in case what? In case I decide to totally screw myself for the sake of stability? And is it good to have stability if that stability means a stable MUCH LOWER income and at least twice my current hours--which means, generally, no flexibility to work adjunct (more money lost) or go to school? So much for the old college education. I have three degrees and I'm still not qualified to do anything. (Well, except law...and who wants to do THAT???)

Oklahoma Hasn't Ruined Me...Yet

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

25% Yankee

10% Upper Midwestern

5% Dixie

0% Midwestern

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

The Chloe Paddington...which do you prefer: Tan or Chocolate?

Survey Says...

I am terrible with decisions. I confess. And I am even worse when it comes to acting on a decision once I have made it. I can (and did) impulse buy a house, but when it comes to everyday items that you can find in a store (albeit, a store that does not exist in Oklahoma), I completely lose my mind. Which is why I insist on bringing all of you along! So here are two posers for you...1) the new Chloe Paddington bag. This is FABULOUS! I absolutely love it, I have seen it in magazines and fell in immediate lust. So yes, I have made the decision that this is a fantastic bag BUT I cannot decide if the tan or the chocolate is a better color choice. So I have posted a photo showing both colors above and need your input on which is better (summer/fall/winter) and WHY. And 2) What do we like (and by "we" I mean YOU) in an engagement ring. Gold (if gold, white or yellow?) or platinum. Center stone: Round, princess, asscher, etc.? I am doing a sort of survey and also gathering appropriate information should the need later arise to pass such relevant information on to...shall we say...a prospective fiancee. But mostly because I am interested in seeing how you answer. So, there you have it...your opportunity to make your opinions known and provide me with some feedback. Go!

Have Taxes, Won't Travel

I am back! I know, I know...I have been remiss about the whole "prompt" or "daily" posting, but I've been busy. And do you really need to hear from me EVERY day? Okay, so maybe you do. So what is new with me? Well, Friday was the official TAX DAY, and by Wednesday I was finally able to get the stupid item error corrected (well, I should say an employee of the company who owns the program that I used to DO my taxes was finally able to correct it, seeing as how the damn thing STILL won't let me access my own page to make the correction myself) so that the IRS would stop rejecting my e-Return. And I thought this whole online filing thing was SO much easier. In truth, it is...just make sure you don't transpose two numbers in your Employer Identification Number box. And I paid my outrageously unreasonable state taxes so we can continue to spend thirty minutes at the 169/244 junction while they pretend to fix the roads, or add a lane, or whatever the hell it is that they are doing. Naturally blockage and disruption like this leads to accidents, which then tie up the ONE bit of free space we have left to actually move our vehicles through, so the whole thing becomes a bit of a bore after the first two minutes or so. And can someone tell me WHY it is necessary to construct and entirely NEW road to divert traffic so they can then work on the old road, ultimately only to tear the new road down again? This seems to me incredibly wasteful. Why not just keep the new road? Because our road crews are crappy? Well, maybe if we taught them English we could instruct them on how to properly BUILD the first road and then we could keep just one. But no...clearly we must spend six months screwing up traffic to build a road we won't use and don't need so we can then move everyone over and fix the other crappy road. And what was so wrong with the first road again? "Progress as Promised." That's what the city calls it. Like it's our fault and they are doing us a huge favor with all of this mess. AND we're about to hit ozone season. Which means the city will beg us to ride the bus or carpool or not buy gas (as if we could actually AFFORD gas) or NOT mow our lawn on a certain day because it is more important that we SIT with our cars idling for half an hour while some jackass (okay, in fairness a whole CREW of jackasses) pretends to be fixing the road. Hmm. Actually this post was supposed to be about my errant teenager, but I guess I was distracted. Well, fodder for tomorrow's post I guess. Happy trails ('cause the roads are blocked!).

Oh Baby!

Does anyone remember the former news segment with the little guy with the mustache (Rick Wells, thanks LT) who traveled around finding weird things and asking "Hey, What's the Deal?" We could use him right now to figure out what is going on with all these pregnant people. I mean, seriously... there is a child explosion on the horizon! Now, this is good news for anyone in the baby-related-item industry, but for those of us who believe that procreation is not the best idea (and we have our reasons, trust me), this is a disturbing anomaly. If only because we are expected to provide the initial onset essentials via baby shower upon baby shower (see previous post). Hubby (LT) and I went to Sam's last weekend and there were five...yes, count them, FIVE...pregnant women in the store in a span of about half an hour. Then two more after we left, one at Barnes & Noble (by the way, there is NO "s" on the end of the "Noble"...can you STOP saying "Barnes & Nobles" PLEASE??? It really bugs those of us who can read. Thanks.), and I don't recall the final one, but they are everywhere! Like a swarm of locusts or something. Without so much of the creepy buzzing noise or worrying one might stick in your hair. Anyway. So one of my sisters acquired three foster kids in the last year, one of my cousins adopted a baby from China, another of my sisters is pregnant with twins, two of my cousins are pregnant, and my sister-in-law is "allegedly" pregnant. What gives, people? Go to a museum or something! I mean, I know there is not a lot to do in this godforsaken town, but have we ever heard of protection? I don't have TIME for all this baby stuff, and ooh-ing and ahh-ing over little creatures who scream and carry on and then grow up to be bratty over-indulged terrors. And yet they will soon be swarming everywhere...get ready for generation WHY.

Ice Skating

I Need a Nap

Well, it's almost the end of the semester at last. And if I could remember to actually drop off my enrollment card for next semester, that would be a good thing. But I, as is the case with virtually every graduate student, have completely lost interest in anything to do with eduction (at least on the receiving end). This whole having-three-jobs-and-taking-two-classes seemed like a good idea at the time. I mean, I like to stay busy. But now I realize...I am just insane. Top it off with the fact that there is virtually a daily crisis to deal with, either at work or at home, and the fact that it seems like EVERYONE in my family is pregnant (except for me, thank god...no way in hell I am having another child) and needing a baby shower, or having a birthday (I do still have those), or having Easter dinner or some other damn event...well, I don't seem to have time to do anything. So I have ruled out "non-immediate" family events absent exceptional circumstances. And I am only working three jobs during the summer but NOT taking any classes. So now I get the standard "are you still alive?" phone calls from my mother, and had to up the minutes on my cell phone plan because no one can ever reach me at a "brick and mortar" location. No one in my family sees me for months at a time, yet I live in (almost) the same town. Come to think of it, we found our current neighborhood when we attended a New Year's Eve party given by a friend of mine from law school. But between my obligations and her studying for the Bar, we haven't seen her or her husband since we moved in...or, since the New Year's Eve party...and that was over a year ago. Life, they say, is what happens while you are making other plans. So am I just having a lot of life? Is anyone else out there just exhausted?

Charles and Camilla...it's about time!

Congratulations, At Last

I am so pleased to see the news headline today announcing that Prince Charles and Camilla Parker-Bowles have FINALLY tied the knot! Although Britain seems somewhat divided on this issue, let's face it, it's a fairytale ending to a less-than-storybook romance. Not that it is really an ending so much as a new beginning, or (as we in the patent business sometimes call it) a "continuation in part." Who cares if Camilla takes the title of Queen or consort, or whatever (that should be a decision between herself and her husband)...a thirty year love affair has finally been made legal. And what is up with these people who lined the streets with signs that said "Diana forever?" Have they been asleep for the last 24 years? The marriage was a SHAM. It didn't WORK. (And, as I hate to remind everyone, the chances of Charles and Diana reuniting are pretty slim considering she passed away some years ago!) It is just an example of the classic arranged marriage bullshit and perhaps the royal families should rethink that angle. Diana is gone. Let this guy finally have the woman of his dreams...and may they both live happily ever after.

P.S. -- Hon, your outfit is FABULOUS! Love the hat. And Charles doesn't look bad either...the age is becoming on him. I would take a morning suit over a military uniform any day. Classic, and very chic.

Sin and the City

Okay. So hubby, boy child and I went to see "Sin City" tonight. It was very loud. Not quite my style of movie, but I'm always game for Bruce Willis (okay, with some exceptions - "Die Hard" leaps to mind). If you are a blood and gore fan this is the movie for you. And it was moderately amusing when the guy received a severed finger in the mail and boy child yelled "Hey...Wendy's!" For the feminists out there, this movie will satisfy all your decapitation and castration fantasies. Although I have to say in the scene where Bruce Willis physically rips a guy's genitalia OFF I was the only one who laughed. Maybe that was inappropriate, and not that I am feminist in any substantive way (other than refusing to clean...LOL), it just seemed funny. Especially when a glance around the theater found most of them men, heads down or eyes covered. Come on guys...they weren't YOUR testicles. Yes, I used the word "testicles" in my blog. (Rachel, if I have learned anything from you it is to work an anatomical reference to male anatomy into a blog at least once a week...and Sunday is your day.) Oh well, it's been a LONG week and I need SLEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Where Am I?

Okay...so I have received no constructive advice on what I should do re my "ring setting" dilemma. I cannot believe you are all so non-superficial! I guess I need to somehow recruit more fashion junkies to my site, but not quite sure how to accomplish that. UGG people (they may be ugly, but they are DAMN comfortable and the ONLY thing to wear on the city streets in NY), Elle-Vogue-InStyle-Harper's readers unite! Again, I am in the wrong town.

Actually, as it turns out, I am not even in the town I thought I was in. I went to a job fair today since my afternoon class was cancelled and talked to several law enforcement agencies, only to discover that I don't actually live in Collinsville (despite the mailing address, utility issues, phone number, and so on)...I live in Owasso! Apparently Owasso annexed my neighborhood (we have suspected this for some time) but none of the critical information was ever changed. So, the good news is I am out of really-small-town-ville, the bad news is that I still have to write "Collinsville" every five minutes on address information. Well, at least now I know where I am. Now if only I could figure out what my last name is...

The pinnacle moves closer...the site for the new T&Co. at the Plaza in Kansas City, MO. Only a four hour drive...

No Breakfast at Tiffany's Here, Part I

Okay, so as I have stated before, the wasteland of Oklahoma has no Tiffany & Co. This is a travesty, I assure you, and has left me with the pressing dilemma of trying to decide whether I absolutely MUST have a Tiffany classic six-prong setting when I have my ring reset. If you have visited www.Tiffany.com, and if you are a connoisseur of "girl's best friend" you may have observed that the six-prong ring setting that every local jeweler pawns off as the "Tiffany setting" is nothing like the real thing. Hence, until this point in time I have gone with the four-prong setting (used on almost every other cut of diamond but which, when used in conjunction with a round stone, sends my jeweler into fits of distress over the possibility that a prong will come loose and my stone will disappear into some void). So, I either go with the four-prong-surely-my-diamond-will-fall-out-and-be-lost-forever OR I must consider the Tiffany six-prong setting. A "regular" six prong setting is just...well...ugly. It sits up quite high, as well, which can subject the stone to greater possibility of damage from being accidentally knocked against something. Suggestions?

Fun with Geometry

If the shortest distance between two points is a line, then clearly the shortest distance between three points is to trench a line right down the middle of my yard. This is exactly what the phone people did last year when we moved in, and now that the "seam" diagonally bisecting my lawn has healed, the cable people have been so generous as to provide us with a brand new one. (At least the cable guy didn't break a window in the process.) This is, of course, in addition to the various flags and spray-painted lines running all over the property. Welcome to spring gardening! Now, along with the multicolored lines and flags, the yard is sporting three new red maples and a flowering dogwood. Now if only I can get my spring cleaning (and the rest of the general unpacking from last year) finished!

By the way, I feel that I must recommend that anyone who is interested in crab cakes refrain from buying these through Schwan's. Chesapeake Bay makes a MUCH tastier crab or lobster cake with huge chunks of meat and is significantly easier to prepare. Just a little tip from me to you.

Pope John Paul II, 1920-2005

Goodbye Pope John Paul II

As a bad Catholic/former Catholic I must admit that I am moved by the death of Pope John Paul II this afternoon. If there is a Godly afterlife then surely he celebrates now. The media reported (this morning, prior to the news of his death) that a group of "young people" had gathered in Vatican Square earlier (either yesterday or today) and the Pope, from his bed, said "I have been looking for you, and now you have come to me." The report indicated that his words were meant for the gathering of young people, but does this strike anyone else as perhaps an erroneous interpretation in terms of the recipient? After all, he spent at least the past 26 years of his life looking for God...perhaps God came to him as the end drew near to accompany him on whatever journey lay ahead. It would be perhaps a fitting end to his life and his dedication to the Church. The Catholic church has lost its spiritual leader, and the world has lost an amazing man. So goodbye, Pope John Paul II...and goodbye Karol Wojtyla. Rest in peace and know the world will remember.

I HEART NY 

Sex, The City, and Strange Things

A good friend of mine from college moved back to town this week, and yesterday I got to go "preview" her new house (before all of her stuff is moved in next week). It's a nice house, good neighborhood, etc...but there was no furniture and the cleaners were there getting everything in tip-top shape to be wrecked by the movers immediately upon arrival (in the rain, no doubt). So, alas, we had to sit outside. As we huddled on her front step something came up about "Sex and the City" and my friend comments that she has seen everything through the middle of Season Six. I am guessing, based on the content of the conversation that she, like me, owns the requisite DVDs of the remaining seasons. Being a good friend (which does not go so far as to loan her my own DVDs), I advised her of locations where she could quickly procure and watch the final season. But she won't! At least not yet. She says that once she watches it, it will really be over. And this is interesting...because here is a show about love and friendship -- really more about friendship and personal growth (okay, and SHOES!) -- and it has been so well done that those of us who have become obsessed with SATC have developed our own relationships with the characters. And when the show ended, we had to mourn the loss of those relationships. This is an interesting phenomenon.

So as we sit on her front porch discussing her NOT watching Season Six (part two), a Schwan's truck drives by which reminds me that I have forgotten -- yet again -- to order groceries and will be relegated to the world of dining out for yet another week (or however often they come by). So when the driver is en route on the street next to her house I wave in a half-mock-panic fashion. But he SEES me! By now the carpet cleaners have arrived (still on the new house project, remember?) and so I have to move my car for them, so I walk around the side of the house and here comes the Schwan's guy! He asks was I waving at him, and I admitted that I was...I told him we had recently (a year is "recent," right?) moved and I had yet to contact Schwan's to have groceries delivered and asked if I could just buy groceries from him right then and there. Of course. It is customary when visiting a friend that you purchase your dinner items for the next week while standing in the street in front of their new house. So that is precisely what I did. I flagged down a grocery truck in a neighborhood all the way across town and bought groceries in the middle of the street, which were then delivered RIGHT to my car!